Have you benefited from an older person spending time with you, sharing their experiences, and speaking into areas of your life? For those of us who can answer with an enthusiastic, “Yes!” we want others to experience what it’s like to be cared for and know this.
Mentors are a foundational part of the Teen Mother Choices® (TMC®) Program. They are women of faith who commit themselves to walking alongside a teen mom through the various stages of the Program. Common concerns from potential mentors include:
- I was never a teen mom. What if we don’t have anything in common?
- What if she doesn’t like me?
- I’ve already messed up my relationship with my daughter, what if I do that again?
- I’m just a ___________. What do I have to offer a teen mom?
From a strictly people-focused/people-pleasing perspective, these concerns seem insurmountable and would disqualify us from becoming a Mentor. But from a Jesus-centered perspective, every woman who follows Jesus as Lord and Savior is equipped and qualified to be a mentor.
In ourselves, we have nothing good to offer another person, but in Jesus, we have Him to give! I’m not saying that every conversation is a three-point sermon with an altar call, but if our identity is firmly secured in Jesus and our confidence is in Him, He is the best gift we could give a teen mom and her child. We can overcome any obstacle the enemy throws our way.
To the concerns a potential mentor voices, I’d respond:
- I was never a teen mom. What if we don’t have anything in common?
You may not have anything obvious in common, but through prayer and persistence, I’m sure you’ll find common ground. Showing the teen mom that you are “for her” and willing to work with her toward a new future is a beautiful foundation from which to build.
- What if she doesn’t like me?
Remember, this teen mom is joining a program and being told she will have a mentor. She may be resistant at first. Give it time. Be consistent. Stay open. We’re called to be like Jesus and not everyone liked Him either. But He remained obedient to His calling and treated people with love and respect regardless of how they treated Him. Do the same!
- I’ve already messed up my relationship with my daughter. What if I do that again?
I’m sorry to hear that, but this teen mom is not your daughter. She has a mom. You are her Mentor. Your role is to encourage, challenge, support and champion your mentee. If you’re hoping for a “do-over” with a substitute daughter, this is not the role for you.
- I’m just a ___________. What do I have to offer a teen mom?
As a follower of Jesus, you’re a daughter of the King. You are saved, chosen, loved, forgiven and redeemed. In your flesh, you may not have much to offer. But you have the same Spirit that raised Christ from the dead living inside you, and you have God’s word that teaches, rebukes, corrects, and trains us in righteousness so you can be “thoroughly equipped for every good work” (2 Tim. 3:16-17). You have everything you need in Him! Keep praying and trusting. God will give you what you need.
Mentorship is a gift – both for the teen mom and the mentor! God uses this relationship to teach us more about ourselves and what we can learn from others.
If you’ve sensed God’s prompting to consider becoming a mentor, listen to His voice. He will use this relationship for His glory and your good.
To every TMC Teen Mom Mentor, current and past, Happy National Mentor Day!! Thank you for investing in the lives of teen moms. There is no doubt about it, we cannot do what we do without YOU!
Written by Kristin McElmurry
